A Million Little Pieces by James Frey

Well, this was a doozy for me. Let me explain. I wrote the review, then I did a Google search to get an update. I always do this with any memoir or biography. Well, I was greatly disappointed to read that there have been numerous, substantiated claims that James Frey fabricated large parts of what he called his memoir. It seems all the allegations are true, as there is now a disclaimer in more recently published versions and they offered a refund to those who bough the book under the impression it was a memoir. I am crushed, because here is what I originally wrote:

This is my favorite book since I’ve started blogging. I hope that sentence alone is enough to make you want to read this entire post. The book is told in an incredibly real tone. I was emotionally attached to the story. I read this book on a whim. I was visiting a friend, looking at her bookshelf. What caught my eye was a book I had given her last year as part of my Christmas book give-away. I started looking at other books and asked if I could borrow one. I picked A Million Little Pieces. If you know me, I like memoirs and true stories. I will read almost anything that holds true to that.

Here’s the story: James Frey woke up on a plane with a hole in his cheek, four missing teeth and a broken nose. He had no idea how he got on the plane or where he was going. He was only 23 years old, but he had been an alcoholic for ten years and addicted to all kinds of drugs. When the plane landed in Minnesota, he went to a treatment facility. It was the best facility in the world in terms of those who graduated from the program and remained sober and clean for a year. (By the way, that rate is 17%. I was shocked this was the best success rate in the world, but many people relapse when they return to their environment.) When he arrived, the doctors told him if he didn’t stop using alcohol and drugs he would die within weeks.

That is the background. The story is James Frey’s time in rehab. I’ve never read a book that was so real. It is like the reader is in his head. It’s amazing how detailed he writes. As his body detoxes, he is constantly throwing up blood and chunks of his stomach. It is gut-wrenching. You know what he is thinking and feeling every second of his stay. How badly he desires a sip of alcohol or a hit of some drug. The stories he shares of his past are incredible.

Why did I like a book about a druggie who got himself into this mess and why should anyone care? I can’t argue that you should. What connected with me was his unique perspective on a lot of things: If you have an open mind, then you have an empty mind. Faith is used to avoid reality. Addiction is not a disease; it is a decision. Calling it a disease is an excuse.  Living by the readings of Tao Te Ching (which will be a book I review very soon). A lot of his opinions went against what he was being taught in rehab and caused quite a controversy with the staff.  But the arguments he made, I agreed with him.

From a reader's perspective, the ending was what I wanted to read. He needed to confess all his sins in his life, and is was devastating to read. The last page with an update of everyone he met in rehab was crushing as well. It left me with a realistic view of how hard it is to overcome addition. This is tough to admit, but my eyes watered numerous times while reading. At points, it is unbearable to read. I wanted to skip parts, but I forced myself to read every word. In my opinion, you are in his shoes and you feel what he is feeling. I think a major reason for this is the writing. His style is unique and primitive. There are no quotation marks, no indentations, and capitalization is random at times.

Do I think everyone will like this book? No. I don’t. It’s probably not for most people. It’s profane. It’s ugly. It’s heartbreaking. And you probably shouldn’t even care about James Frey. But it’s true. It’s real. And I love that.

I'm sure you can see how upset I am. It's like finding out your favorite baseball player used steroids or finding our your wife is having an affair. I hate being deceived and lied to. When something you like and deeply appreciate is not something you thought it was. Even though everything I felt while reading was real, I am disappointed and let down.

I am not giving this book a rating or providing a link to buy it.